When you think of voicemail messages, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? For most of us, it’s how to skip the preliminaries, get straight to the “beep”, and say what we have to say. In short, voicemail greetings are often bleak and boring for callers.
If you’re a business, boredom is an awful way to start off the conversation with potential customers. Since the attention span of a human being fluctuates around 8-10 seconds, filling them up with a standard voicemail greeting is the worst idea you can have.
How can you avoid boring, generic voicemail greetings and opt for creative, funny ones? Let’s find out!
In this post:
- How do I personalize my voicemail?
- What is the best voicemail greeting?
- 20 creative and funny voicemail greetings to try today (listen+download )
- What you need to record creative voicemail greetings.
How do I personalize my voicemail?
Ok, it’s a joke! But many customers still feel neglected when their calls go straight to voicemail.
To avoid those negative vibes, you can use voicemail personalization. And to personalize your voicemail, you need to know your audience and industry. If you’re a business, speak the language of your prospective customers. Creative and funny voicemail greetings can be perfect for businesses in e-commerce, home and gardening, lifestyle products, and niche businesses.
Here’s an example of creative and funny voicemail personalization from a home improvement business:
“Hello! You’ve reached Jeff and ESP painting. Please leave your name, number, and favorite color, and I will call you back soon! Thank you!”
Simple and great, right? So thought this business’s customers – and began connecting to him right away (with most responding to his question!) Sometimes a simple smile can be enough to get a customer to connect to your creative and human side and decide that your business is just what they were looking for!
What is the best voicemail greeting?
The best voicemail greeting is engaging without sacrificing professionalism. It provides relevant information and is updated every few months.
Seasonal voicemail greetings are a simple, creative idea for many businesses. They add a personal, caring touch and are really easy to do.
Need some inspiration? Here are terrific Holiday voicemail greetings, Thanksgiving greetings, and even Halloween voicemail greetings tried and tested by other entrepreneurs.
By the way, if you’re someone with a problem like the one in the above meme, check out Voicemail to Text. You’ll never have to hear another voicemail again, we promise.
25 Creative and 4 Funny Voicemail Greetings to Try Today
- Hello. I’m available right now, but cannot find the phone. Please leave a message, and I will call you up as soon as I find it.
- Hi, this is [your name]. If you’re part of the problem, hang up now. If you’re part of the solution, leave a message.
- Hi. I’m probably home. I’m just avoiding someone I don’t like. Leave me a message, and if I don’t call back, it’s you.
- Hello, you have reached the number you have dialed. Please leave a message after the beep.
- Hi, this is [your name]. I’m sorry, I can’t answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back.
- Hello, this is [your name]. I’m not home right now, but I can take a message. Hang on a second while I get a pencil. (Open a drawer and shuffle stuff around.) Okay, what would you like me to tell you?
- This is you-know who. We are you-know-where. Leave your you-know-what you-know-when.
- Please repeat the secret code, and if you get it right, I will call you back!
- Hello. I’m not here right now, so leave a message! Make it short, make it sweet, or I’ll have to press delete.
- [Your name’s] voicemail is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I’ll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
- You know what I hate about voicemail messages? They go on and on, wasting your time. I mean, all they really need to say is, “We aren’t in, leave a message.” That’s why I’ve decided to keep mine simple and short. I pledge to you, my caller, that you will never have to suffer through another long answering machine message when you call me.
- I can’t come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don’t remember. I’d appreciate it if you could help me out by leaving my name and sharing a little about me. Thank you!
- Hi, I’m sorry I couldn’t come to the phone, but if you hop 3 times, spin around, touch your nose, and say your name, then leave me a message after the beep, I’ll get back to you as soon as possible.
- In an attempt to crack down on spam and nearly-sentient robots, please provide the captcha below to confirm you are a human before being allowed to access [your name]’s voicemail.
- Hey, it’s [your name]. I’m trying to spice up my voicemail, so if you’re going to leave a message, please make it rhyme.
- Hello. You are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows, or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity through the office and don’t need their picture taken. If you’re still with me, leave your name and number, and they will get back to you.
- Voicemail. Speak.
- Hi. Now you say something.
- Sorry, my social battery is at 1%. Currently avoiding humans (or emails). Whisper name and number after tone; I’ll reply when extrovert mode reactivates.
- Emergency voicemail activated! Fighting villains, bad WiFi, or inbox apocalypse. Leave name and number after the beep—I’ll swoop in!
- You know the drill.
- Human interaction timeout is activated. Battling inbox gremlins quietly. Drop name and number post-beep; response incoming… eventually.
- Sorry, I missed your call. If you’re a telemarketer, I’m not sorry. If not, leave a message—I’ll call back soon!
- This classic from Taken (minus the violence), “I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don’t have money, but what I do have is a very particular set of skills. I have acquired skills over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you leave me a voicemail, no,w that’ll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will call you.”
- This George Costanza-approved screening technique (adjusted for yourself, of course):
Listen to more creative and funny voicemail greetings
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- I can’t come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don’t remember. I’d appreciate it if you could help me out by leaving my name and telling me something about myself. Thanks!
- Hi, I’m sorry I couldn’t come to the phone, but if you hop 3 times, spin around, touch your nose, and say your name, then leave me a message after the beep, I’ll get back to you as soon as possible.
- Voicemail. Speak.
- You know what I hate about voicemail messages? They go on and on, wasting your time. I mean, all they really need to say is, “We aren’t in, leave a message.” That’s why I’ve decided to keep mine simple and short. I pledge to you, my caller, that you will never have to suffer through another long answering machine message when you call me.
- Hello. I’m available right now, but cannot find the phone. Please leave a messag,e and I will call you up as soon as I find it.
- Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by me.
- Hi. I’m probably home. I’m just avoiding someone I don’t like. Leave me a message, and if I don’t call back, it’s you.
- Hi, this is [your name]. If you’re part of the problem, hang up now. If you’re part of the solution, leave a message.
- Hello, you have reached the number you have dialed. Please leave a message after the beep.
- This is you-know who. We are you-know-where. Leave your you-know-what you-know-when.
- Hello. I’m not here right now, so leave a message! Make it short, make it sweet, or I’ll have to press delete.
- Hi. Now you say something.
- You know the drill.
- Hello, this is [Your Name]’s VIP voicemail line. If you’re calling with world domination plans or just need a quick chat, spill the details after the tone. Ordinary calls get priority treatment anyway!
- Greetings from [Your Name] at [Company]! Right now, I’m time-traveling through 2026 deadlines or wrestling my evil twin. Leave your name, number, and a timestamp after the tone—I’ll quantum-leap back to you shortly!
What you need to record creative and funny voicemail greetings
Creative voicemail greetings are a terrific engagement and personalization tool for business. But to make them work, you need a business phone system that makes recording, tweaking, and uploading voicemail greetings simple.
MightyCall provides such an answer for businesses. With simple, visually based call flows, adapting your voicemail messages for different seasons, customers, and even different times of day requires no technical knowledge or hardware.
Creative, engaging voicemail messages may look like a small detail in your overall business image. In fact, they’re the difference between your caller becoming a customer, and a caller permanently hanging up on your business.
